Q: Why do people make such a big deal about gratitude, and how can I be more grateful everyday?

A: Expressing gratitude is one of the easiest and most powerful things you can do to manifest what you desire. This is because you are an energetic being living in a universe where your reality is a reflection of your consciousness. When you express gratitude, you are expressing a consciousness of HAVING. If you emit the frequency of I HAVE, you experience more HAVING in your life. Conversely, when you focus on lack, you experience more lack.

First, make the decision that you want to see and acknowledge all the blessings life offers you. Then play around with ways of thanksgiving. Keep a gratitude journal where nightly you list five things for which you are grateful. Play the game of giving thanks to people ten times per day. Practice saying ‘Thank You’ to the Infinite, in your heart, all day long. Give thanks out loud in the car with the radio blaring. Do a few rounds of giving thanks with the kids in the back seat.

Whatever you do, understand that gratitude is a powerful force. If you make it a top priority, your consciousness will expand. And soon, gratitude will become a way of life, creating a snowball of well-being and abundance!

Let me know how it goes!

What It Is

To “Act As If” is to imagine who you’d be, how you’d feel, and what you would do IF you were the YOU in your manifested goal. Then, as life presents you with opportunities, decisions to be made, and situations to respond to, you practice being THAT YOU. Moment by moment, opportunity after opportunity, situation upon situation, you have a CHOICE:

a) act as if you are your “future Self,” or
b) default to the familiar present day version of you.

When you choose to act as if you are the You, you are called to be, the Universe rises up to meet you and provides you with everything you need to move toward and experience your manifested goal. When you choose to default to the familiar present day version of You, you and your current reality remain unchanged.

Why It Works

The reason this practice works is that the moment you set a goal or claim an intention, you give birth to it on an energetic level. Not only that, but in that instant you expand into the bigger, better, “future” you (energetically speaking). You may not feel it. Life may not look any differently. But THAT YOU, now exists – in the energetic realm.

Additionally, once THAT YOU exists, the Universe rolls out an energetic bridge for you to walk toward THAT YOU, so that you may merge with and embody that expanded version of yourself.

How to Work It

What does that bridge look like? How do your recognize it to begin the process of walking over it? The bridge reveals itself as a series of leads. Some leads show up as next step opportunities for you to act upon in faith. (I call these stepping stones.) Other times a lead will appear as an obstacle for you to recognize as a smaller aspect of yourself that you need to outgrow and let go of, in order to expand into the bigger version of you. (I call these landmines.)

When leads appear as stepping stones, they show up as opportunities, ideas, inspiration, people, conditions, situations and insights for you to act upon as if you are already that person (i.e. THAT YOU). Sometimes these leads will feel wonderful and exciting. However, because you are not yet fully experiencing yourself as THAT YOU, other times taking these steps will require an act of faith and courage.

Note: You must take action as the YOU you are becoming. There is no avoiding it. Why? Because your dream will engage with you at the level you engage with it. Period. If you want your dream to engage with you in the physical realm, you must engage with it in the physical realm. If you only engage with your goal in the energetic realm of visualization, affirmation and imagination, it will engage with you only in that realm.

When the lead appears as a landmine, you’ll recognize it because you’ll find yourself face to face with a challenge. Landmines can appear as fear, doubt, insecurity, set-back, procrastination, and/or limiting beliefs. Sometimes the obstacle is so huge that it appears as an insurmountable obstacle, failure, or irrefutable evidence that you cannot succeed. When this is the case you have an opportunity for a major breakthrough, a chance to liberate yourself from a belief that has controlled you (usually most of your life), or a major paradigm shift. These kinds of landmines usually call for guidance or coaching, a profound spiritual awakening, and/or some degree of deeper emotional work.

Simply put, with the right understanding, “Acting As If” is a beautifully effective energetic tool for manifesting any dream. It works for this reason: You can’t be the current version of you and experience a different reality. For example:

• You can’t BE the single version of you and experience a marriage reality. You must BE your wife or husband-self.
• You can’t BE the employee version of you and experience successful business ownership. You must BE your entrepreneur-self.
• You can’t BE the homebody version of yourself and experience the life of a world traveler. You must BE your adventurer self.

Many times we don’t know how THAT version of ourselves would be. We don’t know how to act. We don’t know how it would feel. We don’t know how to proceed. For this reason role models, coaches and teachers make all the difference. When you don’t know what you don’t know, you can’t possibly Act As If effectively. But when you find people to emulate, teachers to guide you, and support to summon the courage to be the BIGGER version of you, Act As If leads to inevitable manifestation!

Choose YOUR Reality! TM
Sonia

Q: Sonia: You’ KNOW what I’ve been going through trying to manifest a very different experience at work after years of misery! Well, I called in Tuesday to tell you everything I’m learning in the UMSI program is paying off. I’d had a really good day at work Monday and it felt like I’d finally shifted. However, Tuesday afternoon and yesterday I felt out of alignment at work again, more like my usual, despite trying to release resistance via a variety of means, tapping, gratitude listing, etc.

Now on Thursday I’m feeling really good again…almost to where I was when I felt that shift on Monday.

My question is, do manifestations and shifts happen like this, with ups and downs but gradually a larger progression toward the up end? Rather than having them happen all at once, where you cross a line and never go back?

A: Great question! The short answer is YES! Transformation, expansion and shifts – in this physical realm – tend to look like 3 steps forward 1 step back, 2 steps forward 1 step back. I have never experienced, observed, or learned about a person who does not go through this.

Now, I can’t speak to what ultimate Nirvana looks and feels like in this physical realm, but according to what I’ve heard from those who are more enlightened than I (and I continue to research this)… even the most enlightened (Jesus, Buddha, Gurus etc.) in this physical realm experience and perceive the triggers of the ILLUSION. Their Egos get activated. The difference between the more enlightened and the less enlightened is HOW THEY RESPOND to the buttons being pushed. This RESPONSE is what we keep learning about and practicing in the expansion process of understanding Ultimate Manifestation.

The more you can simply welcome the reaction, see it for what it is worth, remember that you have fr.ee will and choice at EVERY MOMENT, and CHOOSE acceptance, allowing, and love WHILE redirecting to Higher Truth… the less you will suffer, the quicker the discomfort will pass, and the more your desires will be in alignment with your soul’s truth AND will you manifest more of what you desire.

Hope this helps.
Blessings,
Sonia

(This article is part of a series that began with the May 18, 2011 issue of Soul Food. To go back to the beginning , CLICK HERE)

As we bring our series on the Ultimate Manifestor’s Code of Being to its conclusion, we now move to Tenet #7: Do What’s In Front Of You

In some of the earlier tenets, we addressed the difference between DOING manifestation and BEING the Ultimate Manifestor of your life. When you make this shift, it means you’re expanding your consciousness away from the “effect” which is your physical reality, to the “cause” which is Source (i.e your consciousness – where your TRUE power rests.)

Now then, our consciousness is comprised of our thoughts, words and ACTIONS. And so, one of the challenges seekers encounter as they expand from DOING to BEING lies in understanding how to relate to the necessary actions one must take in moving through life powerfully.

The key to our Code of BEING… is that we are always striving to be one with Source. Open and receptive to the Infinite power, grace, love, wholeness, joy and abundance that is always here.

We must operate from the assumption that we are always being guided to our highest good. That the highest good is here for us always. Our job is to accept and receive the abundance that abounds. For you see, there is no lack of abundance. Source has already provided it. That’s what is meant by “Ask and It is Given”. But just because it is given, doesn’t mean we are in a place to receive it. The experience of lack is on our end. Not on the end of Source.

So… when we take action there are only 2 ways of BEING.

1. Take action on that which is INSPIRING you.This is because Divine Guidance comes in the way of inspiration, OR
2. Simply DO what’s in front of you. (Because if you are seemingly not receiving inspiration, it means that what is in front of you is exactly what you need to be doing for your highest good.

This guidance is vital because the common trap many seekers fall into regarding taking action, is that they think they “should” be strategic, figure things out, or that there is a right or wrong way to approach something.

As soon as you get into “figure it out mode,” you have shut yourself off from Source. You are now trying to “make things happen,” according to your ego’s perception of reality. And you’re resorting to control energy, which is, quite simply, a whole bunch of unproductive resistance.

PRACTICE:

When you don’t know what action to take. When you find yourself asking, “What should I do?” and no guidance or inspiration reveals itself… DO WHAT’S IN FRONT OF YOU. And practice trusting that what you’re doing is exactly what you should be doing for your highest good.

AFFIRMATIONS:

• I am willing to be guided and inspired in all of my actions under all conditions.
• I accept and receive guidance and clarity regarding which actions to take at all times.
• I am willing to trust that what is in front of me to do is for the highest good!
• I am willing to feel safe, guided and peaceful as I surrender to Divine Guidance and Divine timing in all things!

Try it and keep me posted!
Choose YOUR Reality! TM

Sonia

EMPOWERING GOAL SETTING:

As Yehuda Berg of the Kabbalah Center teaches, “The goals are not the goal.” The TRUE goal is your soul’s evolution. Your Soul Self is here to expand, evolve and create. It does NOT accomplish this by setting and meeting goals. It does this by USING goals (generated by the ego) as a short term destination, designed to UNEARTH the things that you must shed and grow beyond in order to become a bigger version of you – the YOU you must become to LIVE the reality that is your goal. When you set goals from this perspective, you can’t fail. As long as you move toward your goal and you keep growing and learning, you will EXPAND, remember more and more of who you REALLY are, and guess what? Your goal (or something better) will manifest!

SABOTAGING GOAL SETTING:

On the flip side, there are a number of problems inherent with believing that your goals are the goal. Firstly, goals are generated by the ego (that part of you that believes you are separate from Source.) So, if you are chasing goals in order to feel better, you are essentially putting out the energy (and manifesting) always feeling SEPARATE from Source (i.e. separate from your power, your well-being, your joy, your abundance, etc.) Consequently, you may manifest your goals, but…

• the satisfaction will be fleeting, OR
• you’ll fear losing “that thing” as soon as you get it.

Additionally, unless the goal manifests exactly the way you intend (the how, the when, the where), you’ll feel like a failure and suffer all the “not enough” feelings that come with unmet goals and expectations (i.e. disappointment, scarcity, discouragement, etc.), which in turn activates an Creative Consciousness that is THE OPPOSITE of what you need to activate in order to experience the fulfillment you truly seek.

ADVICE FOR EFFECTIVE GOAL-SETTING AND MANIFESTATION:

• Forget about time lines! Instead of, “I intend to manifest “X” in 3 months…” try, “I am READY to ALLOW “X” into my life in the next 3-12 months. Instead of trying to “control” your goals into being, see your intentions as “opening the door of opportunity. Walk through the door and stay on the path.
• Once you know your intention (keep it simple), make an itemized list of how it will look and feel as your dreams manifests. That way, as you travel the journey, you can see what IS manifesting, give thanks for that, and allow success to breed success. (Instead of ONLY seeing the finish line, thereby becoming unable to see any progress, and getting pulled into believing “nothing is happening.”)
• Remember: the TRUE goal is your soul’s expansion and as you become more and more of who you REALLY are, the goals will simply manifest as an expression of that. (Slip into thinking your goals are the priority and you may risk using them as a measuring stick that keeps you feeling small instead of supporting you to be the BIGGER YOU, you are already becoming!)

Choose YOUR Reality! TM
Sonia

A: Short-term relationships and long-term relationships are like apples and oranges. To experience success with either, you must understand that they have different purposes and call for different strategies.

Short-term relationships serve two purposes: fun and research. They are great for exploring who you are and who you want to be in relationships. This is where you discover what you want, and more importantly do not want in a partner. So, go ahead, choose a woman because she’s gorgeous, laughs at your jokes, is a good cook, an animal in bed, and loves football. Your criteria for choosing a short-term girlfriend doesn’t really matter because you’re here to have fun, explore and learn.

In contrast, successful, long-term, committed relationships require three things as a place to start: you must have relationship skills, have a pretty clear idea of who you are, and seek a partner who has a good sense of who she is. You must understand that love is more than a feeling, and that it must be supported by actions of commitment, compromise, and sacrifice. You must also be willing to make the needs of your relationship more important than your own needs. This means that you need to know yourself well enough to choose a woman who will not require you to compromise who you are. When dating for the long-term, ask yourself, “Does she bring out the best in me and share the same values and vision for life?”

The Law of Attraction governs what we experience in our lives. If you want to attract a different kind of woman, you must be a different kind of man. By asking yourself the hard questions and being honest with yourself and the women you date, you will stop the revolving door and put yourself on the path to long-term relationship fulfillment.

(This article is part of a series that began with the May 18, 2011 issue of Soul Food.To go back to the beginning , CLICK HERE.)

We continue our series on the Ultimate Manifestor’s Code of Being, as we now move to Tenet #4: Let Nothing Disturb You

The Old Way

What usually happens in our dynamic with “reality” (i.e. read: The Illusion) is that

1. We believe the illusion is real and has power over us.
2. So we be respond emotionally to that belief accordingly. (i.e. if something we like happens we allow it to “make us happy”. If something we dislike happens, we allow it to “make us feel bad.”
3. Our emotions affect us.
4. We make decisions and take actions to whatever degree we are wired to allow our emotions to govern us.

The limitation in this dynamic is that at worst, you react your way through life, making decisions based on a lie (i.e. you are powerless in relationship to your world). If things are going your way you feel good. If things are not going your way, you feel bad. Not a very satisfying way to live life, wouldn’t you agree?

The New Way

1. You practice living each day WILLING to remember that our physical world is an illusion (see Tenet #2).
2. When you have an emotional response to an occurrence in the Illusion you notice and
3. Rather than giving all your power to it by giving it lots of your attention, resisting it, and trying to change the event and or how you feel, you take your power back by bringing your attention back to YOU, honoring your emotion, and allowing it to release naturally (this can become quite easy with a little know-how and practice).
4. With your power back, and your emotions released, you can now make decisions and take action from a place of WISDOM rather than fear or resistance.

Can you see the potential for creating a completely different reality with the New Way? This practice is highly effective in fending off procrastination, paralysis, overwhelm and stuckness. Not only that, but it allows you to live life from your power and intention, rather than from powerless and reactivity.

PRACTICE:

Experiment with The New Way using the guidelines above. When you get to Step “3” practice the following.

1. Once you’ve noticed that you’re have an emotional response, mentally “pause,”
2. Take a breath (you may want to close your eyes)
3. Turn your attention away from the thing you’re reacting to and turn within, then
4. Let go of “thinking” about that thing and experience the emotions as physical sensations. Breathe the emotions and sensations IN. Say yes to them. Breathe out love and acceptance. Keep doing this over and over. Imagine the emotions are waves washing over you and through you.
5. Know this: Emotions are energy. They simply are. They are not problems to solve or equations to figure out with your mind. They are energy. They move. They release. And when they do. You come back to yourself and your power becomes available to you. In the relief after the emotional energy moves. Be still and listen for Inner Guidance. It may come in the form of an awareness, an insight, or an inspiration.

AFFIRMATION:

I am willing to be undisturbed.
I am willing to allow my emotions to guide me back to my True Self.

Try it and keep me posted!

Enjoy!

P.S. In re-reading this Tenent and accompanying practice opportunity, I’m inspired to offer this piece of encouragement. This Tenents of theUltimate Manifestor’s Code of Being are nothing less than KEYS TO YOUR POWER -to your INFINITE POWER. Not everyone is ready to do this work. Frankly, on the surface it can look very boring and sleepy. Charging ahead and “making things happen” in the physical world is much more exciting and seductive. BUT, if you’re among the many seekers who are sick and tired of feeling stuck or powerless, then I encourage you to delve into this less “sparkly” but infinitely more powerful approach to success, healing and transformation. It works!

It absolutely IS!

And helping people explore the possibilities is one of my passions!

Why?

Because I used to be one of those people who compartmentalized her life. I’d work at a J.O.B during the day (most of my waking hours, right?) and then if I had time and energy left, I would engage in the things I loved during the evenings and weekends. I’d come alive during my personal time, but feel unfulfilled Monday through Friday, 9-5.

Well, the Universe has sent me a beautiful opportunity to put together an ultra-powerful F.R.E.E. Master Class designed to help you discover how to bring heart, soul, work and money all together successfully!

I hope you’ll join me!

The class is entitled:

Success for the Soul in Business:
7 Ways to Grow Your Business, Be Authentic,
and Generate Real-World Prosperity Now!

April 27 through May 6th
All Via Telephone
All F.R.E.E.

Want more Details?

Ready to Register Now!
Enter your first name and email below (class details will follow)

I can’t wait to connect with you there!

Blessings,

Sonia

Although you can’t control those things into happening, you can trigger them. This is how:

You must cross the threshold from WANTING what you want – over to DECIDING that you will have what you desire THIS is where the magic lies. Truly. You must DECIDE that you will be, do or have what you desire. Everything flows from there.

Now believe me, I know all the questions that arise from this statement so let me break it down:

1. Write down what you WANT: I want to go to France. I want to coach with Brian. I want to be in a relationship. (As you write your list, ignore the voices that tell you, yeah, but… I don’t know how, I don’t have the money, there are no men…)
2. Now RE-WRITE that same list as if you’ve DECIDED you’re going to have, be or do that thing: I’m going to France! I’m coaching with Brian. I’m going to be in a fulfilling relationship this year!
3. Now, say it OUTLOUD and release it and all the details and questions you have about how it’s going to happen to the Universe! I’m going to France, even if I have no idea how. I’m coaching with Brian even though I have no idea how I’m going to pay for it. I will be in a fulfilling relationship this year, even though every part of me thinks it is not possible.
4. Finally CLAIM receptivity and acceptance of everything you need in order for your dream to manifest. When the Universe inspires a heart-felt desire within you, it ALSO simultaneously provides the way, the means to manifesting it. Your job is to remember this and BELIEVE IT, because believing it allows you to SEE the way when it shows up. If you don’t believe the way is here, you won’t see it, even when it is right in front of your nose!

Once you’ve done these 4 steps, the synchronicity has been triggered, and your job is to stay out of your own way to receive the leads the Universe sends you. The easiest way to do this consistently is this: Every time you find yourself trying to figure out “what to do next” or “how to make it happen” – stop – and say to yourself: “Oh yeah. I’ve decided this is going to happen. It is done. The way is here. I receive and accept it! Thank you!” Then release it knowing that everything is unfolding perfectly. Go on with your life. Watch for the leads and act on them!

The magic is in the DECISION!

Choose YOUR Reality! TM

Sonia

Fear is part of the human condition. No matter how you slice it, fear is going to be a part of your life. Hence, it is not the absence of fear that distinguishes successful dream-makers from unfulfilled wishers. When it comes to fear, the only difference between those that make their dreams come true and those that do not, is how they relate to their fear.

People who successfully manifest their dreams understand and accept that fear comes with the territory. They’ve learned ways to be bigger than their fear, dismantle it, or diffuse it. However, people who are controlled by their fear tend to lack the perspective and the tools necessary to become master over their so-called demons. Here are six winning fear-thwarting techniques:

1) Honor your fear. Emotions are the language of the soul. If fear is rearing its head, pay attention. Rather than pushing it away, listen and explore what the fear is about. If your fear is watching out for your safety, heed its call. But if your fear is heralding an opportunity to stretch beyond your comfort zone, then know that this is the time to take a breath and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

2) Befriend your fear. If your fear is presenting a growth opportunity, practice making it your ally. Rather than pushing your fear away, welcome it and embrace the chance to discover how to live with it. Give yourself permission to be afraid while simultaneously moving forward in your life. Imagine how much easier it would be to take a risk once you’ve given yourself permission to look an idiot, feel like a dork, sweat, shake, or stumble over your words.

3) Play the What’s-the-Worst-That-Can-Happen? game. When fear has its grip on you, it is easy to become consumed by it. Sometimes fear is so big that it is all you can see. When this happens, ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can happen?” Once you have a response, ask again, “And what if that happens? What is the worst that can come of that?” Keep going until there is nothing left to ask.

This exercise can help you realize that what is possible (your worst fear) is not what is probable (the more realistic outcome). A silenced fear tends to gain power and escalate to fantasy. But when you give voice to your fear, not only can it dissipate more easily, but you’ll likely gain a more grounded perspective of your situation. A new view will help you to breathe easier and this will allow you to access your more productive side.

4) Enlist the support of a guardian angel, coach, or cheering section. Going for your dreams requires taking risks. But no one said you have to do it alone. Allowing others to support you in taking your next big step can help you to become bigger than your fear – even if only for a while. By lining up a pep talk beforehand, a smiling presence during, and a safety-net afterwards, you will discover that you can do things you never thought possible!

5) Change your self-talk. Never underestimate the power of words. Words are energy. Words create. They create the world around you, as well as your inner reality. So, notice what you say to yourself. If it isn’t uplifting, find a way to put a positive spin on it. For example, rather than “I feel afraid,” say to yourself, “I feel alive!” Or replace “I’m so nervous I could puke,” with “I’m ready to channel this adrenaline!” And instead of “I don’t think I can do this,” ask yourself, “What is it that I can do?” Mere miracles can occur simply by embracing the discipline of changing the way you talk to yourself!

6) Decide to be Fearless. Believe it or not, sometimes all you have to do is DECIDE to be fearless and one of the easiest ways to experiment with this is with an action you need to take. Ultimately, regardless of how much you work with your emotions and thoughts, every dream you seek to manifest will require action. So, as you face a necessary action remember, you can fake it ‘til you make it. Ask yourself, “Could I simply pretend I’m not afraid?” Try it? You may surprise yourself!

Before you can begin to overcome your fears, you must first decide that you wish to embark on the journey. You don’t have to know how you will do it, but you do need to be willing. Whether it is your personality or the way you were raised, there is much about fear-management that can be approached as a learnable skill. With a small bag of tricks and a little practice, you too can experience the self-confidence and freedom that comes from conquering your fears!

Choose YOUR Reality! TM

Sonia